She directed her first movie at the age of 21 and it starred Carol Bouquet. Harvey Keitel, Rosanna Arquette, Jonathan Rhys Meyers were directed by her as well. She wrote her first novel at 29. Its circulation of 200,000 copies sold out very quickly. She wrote the one and only biography of Johnny Holiday. She is nominated for the Moliere Theater Award. She was awarded the Order of Arts and Letters of the French Government. She lives in LA with her two children from her former marriage to French singer Patrick Bruel.

Amanda Steers was in Bulgaria to take part in the jury of Bulgarian Film Festival Cinelibri and presented her book “Promises” and the film based on it.

“Promises” is novel about romantic love, about unexpected turns of fate, about unfulfilled dreams. Critics describe it as one of the most successful works. It is brilliantly translated into Bulgarian by Krasimir Petrov.

Why did you accept to be on the jury of “Cinelibri“?

Jackie (Jacqueline Wagenstein – president and founder of Cinelibri film festival) has been inviting me for a long time. And I still can’t make it. Either I’m in the process of shooting or something else. We’ve been sharing emails for a couple of years. And I’m fascinated that I was able to come this year. It’s interesting for me to see a country that came out of communism and lived hards years. It’s interesting for me to learn about Bulgarian cinema and literature, to to be part of the jury. I have met brilliant people in the cultural circle of Bulgarian intellectuals I have met so far.

Your father is a psychiatrist. Did that affect your work?

When I was little girl and people asked me what did my father exactly did for a living, I explained them that he was a doctor. And that people are visiting him, went to bed, told him their problems and he treated them. From him I learned that you can heal with words, and I realize that I practice a profession similar to his, but in a different way. Because when you write, you can heal people with words. And more and more I have a desire to help in that way. My father’s profession has also affected my overall approach to life. I’ve always been able to pick up invisible signs of illness.

How do you write?

By hand in one or two notebooks that I use at the same time and then I edit what I write. I also draw a lot in them. I describe characters I’m trying to understand. I write only one novel. I couldn’t do two at the same time. My work on such a text is very exhausting, taking no more than three and a half hours a day. I can paire it with work on other lighter things, like screenplays. I’ve been working on a book for six years and I miss to move a lot. Today I think on taking a walk in Sofia without a guide. Contemplating life by chance and spontaneously is a resourse of finding plots, about discovering emotions. Lately, I miss the luxury of having a lot of time.

What inspires you?

Stories choose me. I just feel them. To sit down to write, something has to touch me very strongly. I’m more interested in love stories. Technically, I can handle a thriller or horror, but I’m not interested. I write stories that I would be tempted to reach for in a bookstore.

And how do you choose the actors in your films?

While writing a book involves freedom, the choice of actors depends on funding, on those who could play the role. It was important, for example, that the actor for the lead role in „Promises“ spoke good English and Italian. And it turned out quite by chance that an actor I liked so much met that requirement.

Jean Reno is among the actors playing in your movie “Promises”. You’ve directed Harvey Keitel too. How is it to work with such actors?

I’ve known Jean Reno for a long time and invited him personally. Working with him is very easy for me. With Harvey Keitel, it wasn’t easy in the beginning. He is used to provoke the director to find out what kind of person he is dealing with, but we managed to become friends. And we still are.

You the sexiest writer in the world, says Vanity Fair? Do you feel like one?

That made me laugh a lot. And my kids had a lot of fun, but at the same time, I was like – mmm! Here’s the male point of view. Then I ask myself – who cares if a writer is sexy. I’d like them to know my mind, I’d like my books to speak for me. There are plenty of women writers both prettier and sexier than me.

Are you still more attracted to the power of men’s imaginations than their physiques.

Yes, though physics has always mattered. When I was young I didn’t feel pretty and I needed men to tell me so, to feel their approval. Over time I began to appreciate them when they were kind, gentle, polite. I value morality because it is rare. Kindness is now much more likely to make me fall in love with someone. And the intelligence of the heart.

You say certain things in life end that for women after 40. Like what for example?

For many women, this is the moment when their children grow up and go off to study somewhere. I gave birth at 23. I was quite young and built my life around my two sons. Women often do so, while men spend time with children when they have time left. And it was very hard when my eldest son left to study at university. I was crying. Little is said about this topic.

There is not enough information in books and movies about what “violence” and shock it is for a mother when her children leave, even though she is glad that they are grown and raised, that they can take care of themselves and work and live independently. I’m obviously not going to have any other children and I’m beginning to wonder what I’m going to do with that freedom. And when you’re not in an emotional, loving and intimate relationship where you’re still building something…

I think about the question of how I might experience a love relationship, whether relationships have meaning and direction. Does life in a couple have real meaning? And what should my center be? I think these are questions many women ask themselves between 40 and 50.

And what is your center now?

I think I’m in a process of finding it. It’s not just my work because I do a lot of things besides that. Maybe I’ll organize artist residencies, do charity work, or do writing workshops to help young people who want to express themselves. And I suppose I’ll continue to write books, too, but without it being a fixation of mine like it used to be.